How to Save your Marriage with an Emotionally Immature Partner

Not everyone is mature enough to be in a relationship.  But these types of people are lucky to have partners (like you, maybe?) who are willing to spend effort to make the relationship successful.

If your significant other is emotionally immature, I can’t imagine how difficult and stressful it is to deal with that kind of relationship.

Sure, in the beginning, it’s easy to brush off your partner’s immaturity but in the long run, things can really get frustrating and discouraging.

But before you pack your bags and fly to Breakup Land, you might want to change things up and do the following:

Evaluate your relationship.

Before anything else, take a moment to evaluate the kind of relationship  you have.  Do you see yourself settling down with your partner?  Is the relationship worth it?  If yes, then proceed to the next.

Talk to your partner.

If you haven’t tried to talk to your other half about the problem because of your fear that he/she isn’t open to hearing feedback, then just try. Sure, immature people can get defensive right away.  But you know what?  They might actually be willing to listen.

Make sure to get your message across clearly and with respect.  And don’t make it sound like you are attacking and criticizing.  Maintain a positive tone and highlight the specific habits that need to be changed and how these behaviors make you feel.  This way, your partner understands how the problem affects you and your relationship.

Don’t be immature yourself.

Sometimes, when things get so frustrating, it’s just so easy to become immature yourself.  Never try to beat your partners at their own game.  You have to take the high road every time, which I understand, takes a whole lot of effort.

Don’t act as the “hero” in the relationship.

Commitment is a two way street.  It takes two persons to make it work.  It takes compromise.  So don’t act like a hero or a parent who just fixes all his/her problems.  The more you do this, the more you tolerate your partner’s immature behavior, which will not help the relationship at all.  Of course you need to understand and be patient, but treat your partners as adults even when they are acting like babies.

Have other interests.

It’s easy to get disheartened and frustrated with small issues when your world only revolves around your significant other.  Make sure there’s balance in your life by developing other interests outside your relationship.  Same goes for your partner.

Have a reliable support system.

Always remember to surround yourself with friends, family or support group to turn for encouragement when you need one.

Should you seek counseling?

Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel is an alternative to counseling. It’s the most successful marriage crisis program in the world.

Always remember that you are not alone and you got this!

About Toni Marie

Toni is a regular contributing author on GuestRelationshipsBlog. She also likes to write about relationships, money, and health.
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